(no subject)

[isdragonlady]

As a reminder to citizens:



Be on the alert for this demon, it is the spirit of Christmas, and generally brings people coal laced with bad luck magic and misery, as befitting such a miserable time of year. It's rumored to be driven off by Dueling him. However this is ill advised seeing as it's a high level spirit of Anger.

Comments

[azuremagma]

Wow, a two fer one grinch special.

[isdragonlady]

What's a grinch?

[azuremagma]

As I understand it, it's a horrible monster that hates the holidays.

So it fits both the thing yer talkin' 'bout AN' ya. Don't be a grinch. This time o' year is pretty nice.

[isdragonlady]

No it isn't. It's a time of the year to reflect on how freaking miserable and cold and lonely it is. And to stuff yourself with terrible cakes.

[azuremagma]

By the fuckin' supreme king jus' go pick up a guy already.

Or maybe stop shovin' cakes inta yerself?

[isdragonlady]

But that's how I spend my nights:

Alone in my place, watching DVR'd versions of housewife talkshows, eating frozen meals and cake.

And then praying to Noriko before bed.

[azuremagma]

...I got a suggestion fer ya, mopey pants.

'Ow do ya feel 'bout blind dates?

[isdragonlady]

I don't go on them?

And I'm not mopey! I'm perfectly happy and content with my life.

[azuremagma]

...Unmopey people dun complain 'bout the holidays an' 'ow lonely they are.

All I'm askin' is fer one blind date fer ya, no expectations from either side. Could be good, ya never know. I think both ya an 'e could need it.

An' 'fore ya get all suspicious on me wonderin' why I'm bein' so uncharacteristically 'elpful, 1. It ain't 'zactly uncharacteristically o' me, I do good shit all the time. An' 2. I feel shitty 'bout the 'urt I've caused people so maybe I can try an' brighten up some people's days.

[isdragonlady]

Christmas from where I'm from is hiding from a demon who either sends you to the eternal pit or gives you coal.

No.

I don't care.

No dates.

[azuremagma]

Well, it ain't all lolipops and rainbows where I'm from either.

So we both might as well suck up our metaphysical angst from bein' spirits an' do the human customs because mopin' an' whinin' ain't gonna fuckin' fix anythin' or bring back the dead.

Also, great! They'll meet ya 'round seven. Thursday good? Thursday's good fer them. I'll get yer moron ta 'elp me with this.

[isdragonlady]

And how's it from where you are.

... No dates.

[azuremagma]

We celebrate the fact that the monsters we cast down no longer rule us but could still emerge from the darkness and swallow us whole.

...Can't 'ear ya over the fact that I've already set it in motion.

[isdragonlady]

Charming.

Stop!

[azuremagma]

I think it is!

TA LATE I'D LOOK NICE, MAYBE CYCLE OFF THOSE CAKES.

[isdragonlady]

I'll triple my cake intake to spite you.

[azuremagma]

Aight! Whatever.

Not my body. Good luck on yer date, dragon lady.

[isdragonlady]

I just finished 3 slices of cake.

[azuremagma]

I'll describe ya as 'pleasantly plump.'

[isdragonlady]

Bit me, jackass.

[becomeanwarrior]

Wait, what.

[azuremagma]

I need Niyo ready fer a date Thursday evening.

[becomeanwarrior]

...Oh dear. Uh.

Dare I ask who?

[Private Thread]

[azuremagma]

Kaz.

Re: [Private Thread]

[becomeanwarrior]

Oh jesus.

Re: [Private Thread]

[azuremagma]

Look. It stops HIS mopin' 'round 'cause of that Shixoko that ain't ya wife, it stops HER mopin' 'round 'cause she's sad an' gettin' fat, an' if they dun kill each other an' wreck the city block, it may even be a good pairin'!

Re: [Private Thread]

[becomeanwarrior]

I'm going to warn you that, knowing both, there is a non-zero chance of them either getting incredibly sadder OR levelling the city block.

...That said I guess I can help out a bit.

Re: [Private Thread]

[azuremagma]

What about the chances of them levelin' that block an' then maybe, Iunno, makin' out?

Re: [Private Thread]

[becomeanwarrior]

...

Well, it's not zero. I have a feeling I know what you're gonna say to that.

Re: [Private Thread]

[azuremagma]

If it ain't zero, we're goin' fer it!

[Private Thread]

[becomeanwarrior]

I knew you'd say that...

[becomeanwarrior]

...That's kind of, dark. Don't you think?

[isdragonlady]

What is?

[becomeanwarrior]

The whole... warning. Christmas is usually a pretty cheerful time.

[isdragonlady]

Not in the 12 Dimensions.

Or at least in a sizable number of regions.

[becomeanwarrior]

...Fair, I guess. But here you shouldn't be moping about at Christmastime! It's all about being cozy by fires and spending time with friends and family!

[isdragonlady]

I'm just going to eat cake and frozen meals covered in cake, thank you very much. I need to let myself go.